


To Fall in Love

by fluffyanon (Marfabu)



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Sadness, angsty !! soz i'm a garbage person, i'm sorry :((
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-26
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-27 03:20:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9950027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marfabu/pseuds/fluffyanon
Summary: Maybe in another lifetime we can meet and we can properly fall in love in a way that magic doesn’t interfere with us and our passions because you deserve better than a broken wizard who makes you risk your life for the fantastic.





	

We were not meant to fall in love.

We were not meant to be more to each other than passing glances of what could have been and brief ideas of fleeting beauty, of what could have been formed over coffee dates and racing hearts. And I’m so sorry that it had to end this way, but our journey has been fantastic and I don’t know how to get this out without sounding like the cliches that you told me to avoid when we first met.

You were so brave, (Y/N), and I’m so sorry that things had to end this way and I need you to know, somehow, that I have never met someone more incredible than you. And maybe in another lifetime we can meet and we can properly fall in love in a way that magic doesn’t interfere with us and our passions because you deserve better than a broken wizard who makes you risk your life for the fantastic.

Pickett misses you. He saw you in passing and almost ran onto your coat and some part of me almost let him. But it wasn’t worth the risk, I suppose, but I wish that I would have taken it one more time. You believed in chances and never letting go and I wish that I hadn’t let you leave. Tina would have seen the look in your eyes eventually, I’m sure, and how broken you felt. Maybe she would have seen it in my own.

I’m sorry that I let you go.

You loved with everything inside of you and I wish that I could have done the same for you. What we had was real and there is not a moment that I do not miss you.

I hope that your career is well. I hope that your dog is alright--I know that you were more worried about him being well-fed throughout our journey than anything else--and I hope that you got him the food that he likes. I hope your boss is treating you well, despite the fact that you took unexpected days off to help me.

I know that any company would be lucky to have you. Any manager would be lucky to employ you with how gentle and friendly you are. I find that, above all, your silence is what I miss the most.

You never said much to me, and yet I feel like we had known each other for years without interruption. I miss the way that silence was a gift with you and how you used words to mean something, not to fill the spaces that we couldn’t naturally.

I find that I miss you more than I thought that I would with every passing day. Time does not heal a broken heart, and I fear that I will never love again.

You gave me the best three days of my life and showed me the magic of being magical. Every day with you was an adventure of what we could experience in our limited time and restricted schedule. Every spell was a new invention to you and I find that I’ve used my wand less and less over the past few weeks in your absence. 

You gave my magic a purpose, and Tina finds it silly, but I don’t find magic as...magical as it was with you by my side. I just want to be like you, truly, so that I could be with you.

You told me of Romeo and Juliet and showed me the classic books that you liked, reciting stories like you had read them just the day before and I miss your quotes so much that sometimes, I find myself picking up books at libraries in the cities that I go to in hopes of finding you within the pages. I wish you into every page and find your wit in every word, and more often than not I turn the page expecting to find you there but you’ve left, of no fault of your own. I pushed you away. I was the one that told you that it would be okay, but I’ve found that I’m the only one that’s truly been affected.

You remember nothing, and I often find that it’s better this way. I find that I prefer the idea of you never knowing me than you having known what lay on the next page of your story, only to have to leave it behind. Better for me to hurt than to have you hurt alongside me without being near to me. 

I find that I come back to this letter in hopes of finding you among my words, reading along with my every phrase, but I often find that it’s all been in vain. You worked so hard to help me and I wish that I could have worked just as hard to keep you next to me. I miss your warmth and your voice is what I’m losing first among my memory of you.

I wish more than anything to see you once more, but I do not know if I will ever return to America in fear of seeing you and knowing that you see me as nothing more than a passing glance of what could have been. I hate to think that you would only see me as a possibility and not a definite. 

I wish to see you again, but I know that my heart cannot bear the sight of you anymore. At least not until I shake you from the places that you used to be. At least not until I can sleep without waking up to find surprise laced in my veins as I come to the realization that I did not try hard enough for you.

I wish I was as brave as you were for me, but I have never been quite as outspoken as you. I wish that I could have been for you. I wish that I would have done more for you.

I miss you and I love you, and I’m sorry that I did not work hard enough for you in this lifetime. I hope to whatever God you prayed to that I find you in the next one and find the words to keep you with me.

I’m sorry, (Y/N).

Forever yours,

Newt Scamander

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading this! i really hope that you did enjoy it, and if you did please feel free to leave kudos and a comment! i appreciate comments a lot, even if they're just word vomit of your initial reaction to the story. thank you so so much for reading, and i hope that you have a good day! x


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